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To my Canadian friends,
I'm sorry to hear that the soul of your country is being tested by Tim Horton's, which apparently is going to start offering espresso and cappucinos along with the usual, time-hono(u)red just-a-coffee and donuts. This comes from commentator Rex Murphy on CBC's The National. Mr. Murphy is considerably exercised, in his own unique way, that Timmy's is trying to be too much like Starbuck's. Although, he noted himself, they are also offering lasagna, of all things. "What are they, a pasta factory?" he asked (I'm paraphrasing here). I've never seen lasagna at a Starbuck's, so here Tim's is venturing (or maybe venti-uring?) where the nekkid lady with the long flowing hair has yet to go.

I'm concerned, not only because Canada is one of my favo(u)rite countries, but because I'm a regular habitué of Tim Horton's outposts here in the states. They just remodeled the outlet I visit the most, and it's looking mighty swank, let me tell ya. Almost too swank. I'm a bit concerned for my own soul. Hm, I wonder if they'll have butterscotch flavoring for the cappucinos. I mean, yes, it's an outrage.

Or ... not.

Yours sincerely, etc.

(No, really, Peter Mansbridge introduced the segment saying something about the soul of Canada. I'm not making this up!)



( 11 comments — Leave a comment )
Nov. 4th, 2011 05:11 am (UTC)
Tim Horton's is Hamilton's revenge on the rest of Canada.

Nov. 4th, 2011 03:10 pm (UTC)
But what did Canada ever do to Hamilton?
Nov. 4th, 2011 05:19 pm (UTC)
In many ways Hamilton bore the brunt of corporate industrial manufacturing misbehaviour for the entire Canadian car industry for about 50 years - it was the primary iron and steel refining and mfg plant for the big car companies in Canada, for example. So for that period of time it was heavily polluted and relatively little of the city's expenditure went into civic infrastructure - it was all about feeding the steel companies. Profits left the community, going at first to Montreal and Ottawa, then later to the US.

Then the manufacturing went away, the city's population shrank by about 50%, and the tax base shrank even more, so now it is a post-industrial town with relatively weak infrastructure and not much money to go around. For reasons known only to themselves, the government decided to encourage people on long-term welfare to move to Hamilton; and they also elected to maintain the massive low-security incarceration facility and ship low-level criminals there from all over Ontario.

Despite 50 years of begging, pleading, negotiating, bribing, and study after study proving it feasible, the federal and provincial government will not build a dedicated fast rail connection with Toronto and the US.

Etc etc etc.

Most Canadians know it as an industrial slum, which it is, and instead of pouring resources into cleaning it up, they heap derision on it and refuse to spend anything on it because it has too many problems :/ how's that for a catch-22

Wealthy and influential people don't live there because it's a slum, and therefore the resources they could command never reach Hamilton and so it gets worse and worse.

I could just go on and on. So I'd better stop there :)
Nov. 4th, 2011 07:30 pm (UTC)
Hm. I didn't realize all that. I intended my response as kind of light; sorry about that. Thanks for the background. Sounds a lot like another city I know. Especially the part about how the rest of the country would rather heap derision than lend support.

Still, I don't think Canada thinks that donuts and coffee are that much of a punishment, as mediocre as they are. Unless the lasagna has extra fat and cholesterol in it, maybe.
Nov. 4th, 2011 07:46 pm (UTC)
the thing I hate most about TH is that it's astroturf

It's owned by corporations, run by MBAs, but smeared over with a greasy coating of being friendly to working class people. Really what it's doing is selling crap coffee and crap frozen-extruded-starch-pellets and labelling anyone who dares to complain as elitist and snobby and un-Candian.

hell it was even owned by an American corporation for years.

the GOP themselves couldn't do better at screwing working class people by invoking inverse snobbery
Nov. 5th, 2011 12:27 am (UTC)
Back in the day I used to joke about "Tim & Wendy Horton." Then Wendy's sold Tim's off.

MBAs ruin a lot of things.
Nov. 4th, 2011 10:42 am (UTC)
Tim Horton's makes me sad. I don't want macaroni and cheese or a paninni, I want a cup of coffee and maybe on occasion a Canadian maple doughnut.
Nov. 4th, 2011 03:10 pm (UTC)
They must be trying to look like a Panera or something now. Why, I don't know. I'm worried that they'll spend too much space and resources on things like macaroni and cheese, and they'll run out of chocolate chip muffins every day. That would make me unhappy.
(Deleted comment)
Nov. 4th, 2011 07:31 pm (UTC)
Where's my special font for "groan"?
Nov. 4th, 2011 11:38 pm (UTC)
Tim's used to be good.

Now it's consistent.

Consistently crappy.

They used to have actual bakers baking actual food.

Now everything comes frozen from the factory.
Nov. 5th, 2011 12:25 am (UTC)
Admittedly, my standards are low. Also, Dunkin' Donuts is out of the way for me, though if they do things differently I'd be surprised.
( 11 comments — Leave a comment )

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